Today, I'm sharing a special success formula with you. Whether you experience LBL once in a while, or you deal with it all the time, this formula can help you create the best possible outcome – even in the middle of your most embarrassing moments. You can use this formula whenever you find yourself in any situation that feels outside of your control. The formula is: E + R = O. I use it often when coaching women, and I teach it in my workshops.
The "E" in the formula stands for an "Event." What's an event? You experience an unexpected leak while running from your car to an office building – that's an event. You enjoy a laugh-out-loud moment with a girlfriend, then … oops, you leak – that's an event. Events happen. You don't always have control over it.
The “R” in the formula is your "Response." It's how you choose to respond to the "Event." Most people have an automatic reaction, instead of a conscious response to challenging events, because they don't realize there's a choice.
The "O" in the formula is the "Outcome" or result. Let me give you an example. You're driving on the expressway. The car behind you is driving too close to your back bumper. That's the event. You might respond in a variety of ways:
• If your response is to get irritated and annoyed, the outcome is increased stress and feeling miserable.
• If your response is to "teach that driver not to mess with you," the outcome may turn into road rage.
• If your response is to change lanes and say to yourself, "I'm steering clear of that guy," you relax and have a pleasant drive.
In each case you experienced the same "Event" and a totally different "Outcome." Your power in life is in your "Response." When you make a habit of focusing on your response, a world of new opportunities begins opening up for you.
It may feel like you have no power over your LBL moments. You experience a leak, and the outcome may be that you feel embarrassed, you start holding back your laughter, stop playing with your kids, stay home - you retreat from doing the things you use to enjoy. What might happen if you changed your response? I received an "Ask Marilyn" question from a woman who is going overseas and wanted to know if she would be able to find Poise pads in China, or if she needed to bring enough with her to last through her trip. She is a woman who"s taking control of her power – her response, so she can live her life as full and vibrantly as she can.
What about you? Are you embracing your power to choose a response that best serves you? How have you changed your response to LBL moments to produce better outcomes in your life? Have you started pelvic floor exercises? Compared notes with your girlfriends? Seen a medical professional? Please share. You never know how much your example may help and support others.